My Kid is Cracking Me Up.  

Saturday, February 6, 2010

My oldest son who is actually my middle child now that Rachael has come back into our lives, has gone off to college last fall. I admit he is fairly bright, competent, and slightly cockey. Okay he's a lot cockey, but he wears it well most of the time. I told him when he turned 17 that I had one year left to fill his head with useless information that will come in handy one day. He wanted no part of that and kept himself so busy that he was barely here till it was time to go off to college. I didn't say much, he was finding his own way in life and as long as it was in a forward direction it was okay with me. I knew there would be a day that he would realize that adulthood isn't as wonderful as he thought it would be and he would be back for all that useless information.

It started a few months after he moved. He asked me if adults are always feeling ency inside, this made me smile but I only answered "yes" Then he sent me a message stating that he needed ink for his printer. I am so glad he couldn't see my face and how badly I was vibrating from laughter when I replied, "so is there a store on campus". His response was "Oh.... yeah" to which I told him to go buy some, he would have it faster than if I went to get it and send it. Then he needed spiral notebooks. Again, chuckling inside I reminded him of the store. He decided that it would be cheaper for me to send some since he knew I had a box of them that I only paid 5 cents a piece for. He was going to have to pay WAY more than that for them on campus. Okay, I went to the post office with 4 spiral notebooks, pruchased an envelope big enough to fit them and paid the postage. Off they went. When he got them, I told him to look at the outside of the envelope to see how cheap it was for him not to go to the store. He was surprised. Sending packages isn't cheap.

Last week he wanted to send me some papers. He had to ask how to address the envelope. I didn't say anthing, but once again I am laughing at him from a far. How many times has he looked at envelopes and never paid attention. So I talk him through proper envelope addressing, saying nothing about postage. He mailed it, I got it with no problems. He decides to send me more stuff, I have no idea that and he puts money in the envelope. Lots of money,.... and doesn't tell me there's money in it. I left it lying in the mail box, on the table, didn't open it for days. When I did here is this money he wants me to do something with. Gently I remind him that sending cash is risky, and to at least let me know so I can tend to it properly. That's one I know I told him about but he must feel its a wives tale.

So unannounced again he sends me more stuff in the mail. He's mastered the postal system. I have no idea what it is but its not here. Its been days and he is wanting to know what happened to it. I start asking questions. How much stuff did you send? Did you put proper postage on it? How big was it? He's confused.
What difference would any of that make?

Well my son mail is weighed and postage is paid accordingly. I asked if he put the correct zip code on it since that is how mail is first separated. How long ago did you send it? You have to allow at least 5 to 7 days for delivery, not that it takes that long but it can depending on the size of the post office in the big city and how much mail they have to sort on a daily basis. Not at all like the little two spit town you grew up in.

At this point I am totally enjoying his misfortune, mostly because I know it will probably get here soon enough, and that this is his first experience with the U.S. mail botching something. I can hardly contain myself when I get an email from him that simply said "well shit". He's speechless, his friends told him unless its a package one stamp will do. He never thought about the volume of mail that his new post office has to process, that mail is weighed, or its separated by zip codes.

I'm absolutely dying over here trying not to piss him off, so I send a message saying "all that useless information I tried to give you was for a reason". I got a reply stating that I never told him about the U.S. mail.

I waited a while before responding with, "you didn't want to know" "You think this is bad, wait till you open your first checking account" "it will be endless hours of entertainment (for me) frustrtion for you" I got no reply for quite a while, I sent another message asking if he's done talking ot me for now. He responded "YES" but I love you mom.

To which I sent my last response, "love you too" "and love love love watching you grow into an adult"

I know its mean, but it is so much fun watching him grow through this part of his life. Who knew that ink, envelopes, stamps, and mailing something was so involved?

I'm really not looking forward to balancing a check book over the phone or through chat. But I'll do it, and I'll enjoy every minute of his growth.

Love you T. Hang in there.

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3 comments: to “ My Kid is Cracking Me Up.

  • Unknown
    Sunday, February 7, 2010 at 7:11:00 AM PST  

    I am soooo with you! My son is now a junior in college and couldn't cash a check given to him by his grandmother for Christmas! Based on the store clerks who continue to ask if we want receipts for our debit purchases, I don't know if this generation will EVER learn to balance a check book. They will trust thier online balance and continue to miscalculate until they get sick of paying the fees.
    Cosby once said: At 16, thier brain pops out and they say... "I dont need that!" At 21 ish, they say "Where did I put that thing??"

  • Unknown
    Monday, February 8, 2010 at 4:30:00 AM PST  

    Great posting. I've been following your posts lately, just don't have the time to respond. The first thing I thought of Lori was, wonder how he'll do w/check writing/balancing! The sending of supplies thru the mail was a hoot! Just gotta love kids and their thinking! lol! So you too bought up all the spiral books? I bought 24 at .5 cents. Just for Janine's boys who are still in school!

  • Lori A
    Monday, February 8, 2010 at 6:20:00 PM PST  

    LOL yup I got another email today "mom I am so sorry could you please help me purchase this thing for my class" "you have all my information off my card right"

    NO!! NO I dont have all yor info not to make purchases. I didn't say anything he lost a classmate over the weekend from his dorm. Two boys were killed in a car accident on their way back to MSU. I just got the info and purchased the stuff he needed. He really has had a tough start to adulthood.

    I gotta agree with Cosby, my son is always coming to me to find all the stuff he can't remember where he put. The letter still hasn't arrived BTW. Dont' know what happened to it but at least it wasn't his W2. Most likely I dont need it to do his taxes. Yes I will be doing that for him too.


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