Public Display of Affection  

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Although it seems like a million years ago now, I have something that might give you a taste of what it was like to be me, pregnant at the age of 16. I pulled this question off of yahoo answers just a minute ago. I have to admit that there are a lot of people who no longer feel this way toward first mothers, but that has come from the sweat of some very brave peoples backs. It is not easy standing in front of a crowd with this mentality and trying to get them to humanize the producer of their most precious commodity, their child.

I feel that this is a direct result of industry language. You know, what adoption workers use to make adoptive parents feel superior. But they can not be held unaccountable. They are responsible for their actions just as I was held accountable for mine.

My disclaimer: To those of you who have adopted and realized that your child had another set of parents before you and that those parents should be treated with as much respect as any other parent, I applaud you, and this post most certainly does not apply to you.

Here it is. It's short, but depicts exactly what it is meant to, hatred.


Open Question
Why do you think peeps think that all bm's are victims?
on here all birth peeps have an excuse am i the only one that sees

Nope, I'm with you man. I am sick and tired of their martyr syndrome. Keep your kids and raise them like the rest of us do, they don't deserve to play the victim role for ducking out of their responsibilities. Then they say the are looked down upon by society....WELL precisely do you expect to be treated?Don't get me started with this crap!By the also stands for bowel movement, ya know like sh!t...sounds like a pretty good representation to me.Natural mother??? What is natural about birthing a child and abandoning it?
Birthmother HATER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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4 comments: to “ Public Display of Affection

  • Anonymous
    Friday, February 20, 2009 at 9:22:00 AM PST  

    This hurts me to the very core of my being! I too am a first mother that gave birth to my son at 16 years old, if only I knew then what I know now.

  • Lori A
    Tuesday, February 24, 2009 at 10:48:00 AM PST  

    Desi, It's hard to be who we are isn't it? That's the message I'm going for. Young mothers in todays world need to know what a long hard road this can end up being for them.

  • Being Me
    Thursday, February 26, 2009 at 6:32:00 PM PST  

    Oooooohhhh, that makes me mad.

  • Unknown
    Sunday, May 3, 2009 at 11:27:00 AM PDT  

    Thanks for linking this post, Lori. I have visited your blog on other occasions, and have been interested in what you have to say, but I am 20 years into a not-very-satisfying reunion with my lost son, and a lot of the reunion story things I feel sort of 'been there done that' about, either rightly or wrongly, and they don't capture my (admittedly very limited) attention. I apologize for that. As I have been reading this one and then on to some others, I find much more to entice me back.

    RE: this post...what a hate-filled place YA can be! This is so very typical of a lot of the contempt that is evidenced. I find it interesting that when a woman is up against a wall, with absolutely zero options, and surrenders to the only possible outcome, she is still held accountable for her 'choice'. To me, it all seems remarkably similar to the mentality of blaming a rape victim for her choice to wear a provocative outfit, suggesting that by doing so she 'asked for it.' Further evidence of blaming the victim, only with much more up to date and PC language.

    I will be back, Lori. Thanks for this.

    Sandy Young


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